If we were still together, today would have been our three-year anniversary. But we're not together. We're not even talking anymore.

A part of me really wishes we could stay friends - and maybe we still are. Maybe we're the kind of people who can not talk for months and months and then be totally fine. Or maybe this is the way it's supposed to be now. I don't know...

To be honest, I have little or no choice in the matter. There is another person involved, after all. If he decides to ignore me and what we had, focus only on his life as it is now - that's the way it is. I'll have to accept that. But it still makes me a little sad.

I wanted to believe that even though the passionate, intense, inspiring and all-consuming love we once shared was over - we would always be a part of each other's lives. Now, I'm not so sure.

Sometimes I wonder how long this date will have significance for me, and how often his name and memories of him will randomly enter my thoughts... It's not as frequent as it used to be, but I'd be lying if I said it didn't happen at all anymore.

Maybe the only way to really get over and move past your first love, is to meet and fall in love with someone else - the someone you're supposed to be with... But maybe not even then - not when it's your first love and you fell as hard as you did. Not when it was as life-changing as it was.

I guess we'll just have to wait and see what happens...